Wife of Pastor: How to 'Walk in God's Will' According to Our Pace?

A woman on a green rice field
A woman on a green rice field (photo: pexels.com)
By Steve Sun March 20th, 2023

Editor's note: Huiru (pseudonym) is the wife of a pastor from Guangdong Province who was born in the 1980s. She worked in a company for four years after graduating from college and then entered the church from part-time service to full-time ministry. In the course of her ministry together with her husband, she always made it a priority to rely on God and be able to renew her strength in all situations. Calling herself the glorious helper of his husband, mother, and teacher of her children, Huiru shared with the Christian Times, an online Christian newspaper in China, how she can serve the Lord with all her heart in these areas and still feel confident that she is on the right path.

Christian Times: How do you think women can improve their sense of confidence and accomplishment?

Huiru: Christian women should try to find a sense of belonging in their relationship with God, rather than a desire for social or self-imposed judgment.

Most of all, we should believe that God values us and that He values us more than pearls. All sisters should seek and obey God's teachings. When we humbly pray to God, He will give us all the wisdom, discernment, and insight we need.

Before I got married, I worked in the company for about four years as the boss's secretary after graduation. Every time I got back to my office, I prayed first in my office to God, and I entrusted my day into his hands. I changed from a humble girl who just graduated to a respected employee.

When I first got involved in church ministry, I led a small gathering. Its members are either graduate students or doctoral students and are engaged in scientific research or education. I did not do it on my own but sought God so that I might receive true power and their testimony.

In addition, if we do things for the sake of glory, it is easy to feel frustrated. Don't expect praise from people, but praise from God, because in the end we will face Him.

Christian Times: What positive meaning and value do you find in your position as the wife of a pastor?

Huiru: Other people would look at me with different expectations, which are quite different from what they expect from a common sister. The believers expect me to be an example of their faith.

Wives of pastors are also burdened with the expectation of being matched as pastors. I also have my moments of imbalance when I can't juggle my ministry and family affairs.

I couldn't serve my parents and parents-in-law well because I'm busy with work at the church. Sometimes we care more about our church elders than we do about our biological parents. The children, who were free to play on Saturday and Sunday, often follow us everywhere we go.

It may be hard, but God never lets us lack anything. At the same time, as the wife of a pastor, you will gain a lot of trust from the believers. When I spoke of the needs of the church, the faithful would rise up and support my work.

Christian-times: As the wife of a pastor and a mother raising children, what would you say to your single and married readers?

Huiru: When it comes to my advice, I think the most important thing is to do everything according to our pace.

If you are single, you can use your talents and serve more freely. At the same time, you can prepare your faith, prepare to be a wife, and prepare to be a mother.

Married sisters should learn how to be glorified helpers to their husbands. If I have children, I will learn how to raise them and how to accompany them as they grow up. I have three children, and the youngest is two and a half years old. I think my mother's company and guidance were very important to me when I was young, so I will make some time available to accompany my children. I may sometimes fall short of what believers hope for, but I will be honest with them about my limitations.

We also have to follow God's arrangement. God had arranged the time when He made everything. It's the same with us. He had arranged when we would get married when we would have kids when we could have a second career, when we would participate in our ministry again, and when we could take advantage of our talents again. In fact, God had already arranged the time for us. We need to learn to be patient and wait on Christ.

- Translated by Nicolas Cao 

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